How Positive Psychology Can Promote Children’s Wellbeing and other Benefits

By Ella Jackson-Jones

Marketing Assistant for Appreciating Change and part-time Nanny, writing from her perspective as a Nanny

As a childcare provider I see the benefits of incorporating positive psychology techniques and practices in all aspects of children’s lives from a young age. It helps support their emotional development, promote wellbeing, and build resilience that they can carry with them into adulthood. Generation Alpha children will have to navigate an ever more competitive, demanding and increasingly complex education system and job market, as well as cope with being embedded in social media with access to 24/7 news. They are growing up in a world of globally connected new technologies which will become part of their everyday lives, and that will ultimately shape their attitudes and expectations of the world.

Young children need to learn the skills necessary for managing their emotions. Adults who can model this are essential in helping to shape children’s emotional development. There is a strong link between mental health concerns in children and their ability to regulate their emotions. Assisting children to cultivate positive emotions helps to mitigate mental health issues not just for them but for future generations also.

Poor emotional regulation can manifest as behavioural or mental health issues in children such as depression, anxiety, eating disorders, mood disorders, sleep disorders and neurotic disorders. Children are affected by life’s adversities, in particular those from lower socio-economic backgrounds or those who have experienced high levels of trauma, are more at risk of developing a mental health condition, with 1 in 6 children aged between 5 and 16 currently likely to do so. In addition, 39.2% of 6- to 16-year-olds have experienced a deterioration in mental health since 2017. Educators and parents are seeing the consequences of both an education system, and traditional parenting styles, that ignore the importance of the mental health needs of children.

An answer to some of the issues faced by children may lie within the teachings of Positive Psychology. It is already known that wellbeing is a clear indicator of academic achievement, success, and satisfaction in later life (Wise up: prioritizing wellbeing in schools) and it is possible to support the wellbeing of children through our interactions with them both in and out of school. Research into the effects of positive psychology interventions in young people is still in its infancy, however there are systematic reviews that suggest these interventions benefit the wellbeing of children now and the children of future generations.

Social Emotional Learning (SEL) is a method that aids both children and adults to recognise, understand, and manage their emotions. SEL targets 5 areas; self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship skills and responsible decision making. In time, working with SEL, children learn to establish and achieve goals, express empathy for others, engage in healthy relationships and make responsible decisions. . The benefits of this kind of intervention include better academic performance, improved attitudes and behaviours, greater motivation to learn, deeper commitment to school, increased time devoted to schoolwork, fewer negative behaviours, decreased disruptive class behaviours, reduced emotional distress, fewer reports of student depression, anxiety, stress, and social withdrawal. Organisations such as the Education Policy Institute are fighting to have SEL integrated into the national curriculum in the UK.

Another way we can attend to the social and emotional needs of children is by supporting them in the fostering of good and healthy relationships with others since the quality of our relationships affects our ability to have a happy and fulfilling life.

There are always ways you can practice positive psychology techniques with your children at home. I have listed some ideas below.

• The Good Things List – Each day you can work together to write a list of 3 good things that happened that day which children can refer back to as they grow up.

• Relationships – Make sure children spend quality time with parents, special relatives, and friends.

• Random acts of kindness – Encourage your children to do one act of kindness each day and talk about how doing nice things for other people make you feel.

• The Gratitude Jar – Assist your child to write down 5 things each day that they are grateful for and pop them in a jar, each week you can reflect on all the wonderful things they appreciate.

• Goal chart – Create some short- and long-term achievable goals. Keep reviewing them and reflect on how you feel as your achievement list grows.

• The strengths list – Discuss and write down your children’s strengths. Focus on some each day to help them improve their day or to help someone else.

• Savouring the moment – Take a part of your child’s routine that you both enjoy and slow it down so you can really enjoy the moment.

It is possible and important for you to provide the tools and scaffolding children need to look after their mental health and wellbeing throughout their lives. By teaching them to focus on the positives and create happiness from the little things will help children be more resilient in times of adversity and mitigate against mental health conditions in the future.

The following sources helped inform this paper

• Mental Health of Children and Young People in England, NHS Digital, 2020, accessed, https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/publications/statistical/mental-health-of-children-and-young-people-in-england/2020-wave-1-follow-up

• Mental Health of Children and Young People in England, NHS Digital, 2021, accessed, https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/publications/statistical/mental-health-of-children-and-young-people-in-england/2021-follow-up-to-the-2017-survey

• Young Minds ‘Wise Up’ prioritizing wellbeing in schools. www.youngminds.org.uk

•  Social and emotional learning: An evidence review and synthesis of key issues – Education Policy Institute, 4th November 2021, accessed, https://epi.org.uk/publications-and-research/social-and-emotional-learning

 Other Resources

Sarah Lewis is the owner and principal psychologist of Appreciating Change. She is author of ‘Co-Creating Planning Teams For Dialogic OD’, ‘Positive Psychology in Business’ ‘Positive Psychology at Work’ and ‘Positive Psychology and Change’ both published by Wiley. She is also the lead author of 'Appreciative Inquiry for Change Management'.

APPRECIATING CHANGE CAN HELP

Appreciating Change is skilled and experienced at supporting leaders in working in this challenging, exciting and productive way with their organisations. Find out more by looking at how we help with Leadership, Culture change and with employee Engagement.

For further information on these alternative approaches to change, please contact us or phone 07973 782 715. A selection of strength card packs are available from our online store.

If you want to know more about implementing approaches and processes that positively affect people’s happiness, engagement, motivation, morale, productivity and work relationships, see Sarah’s positive psychology books.

More blog posts categorised as ‘Thought Provoking’ 

Feeling Tired? You need more than just a good’s night sleep.

Did you know that there is more to being rested than just getting a good night’s sleep? Dr Dalton-Smith has identified seven different forms of fatigue. Each one offers a different path to feeling restored, rested and rebooted!

Mental Fatigue

Mental fatigue is characterized by a sense of working through a mental fog, of making mistakes because you can’t concentrate properly, of feeling befuddled. This one I definitely recognize! A simple way to address this is to intersperse periods of intense concentration, each forty-five minutes or so, with short time blocks of ‘low level’ activities, like email and social media of ten minutes duration. This way you stop the attention destroying activities getting in the way of work that needs intense concentration, and, you give yourself little ‘a change is as good as a rest’ breaks from the more demanding work. Taking regular breaks to attend to the ‘low level’ work also gives you a fighting chance of staying on top of it and reduces the worry that something is lurking in your email that really does need attention now.

Emotional Drain

This is characterized by feeling you have nothing left to give to others. To help reduce emotional tiredness, you can reduce contact with people who you find draining, open up to more re-energising people a bit more and to try not to compare yourself badly with other people ( a particular danger of mindless social media scrolling). Personally, I often find ‘transit time’, either spent actively in a restorative action like reading or spent passively gazing at the adverts on the Tube while my mind wanders, helps regather energy for the next interaction.

Social Tiredness

Social tiredness comes from effortful socialising, being with people with whom we feel we can’t be ourselves. This is a subtle but distinct difference from emotional tiredness. Many of us find ‘small talk’ exhausting: I used to refer to social tiredness, after a busy day or week working with strangers, as being ‘all peopled out’. However, the way to recuperate isn’t just to avoid people, but rather to spend time with people, usually friends and family, with whom we can be our unvarnished self. 

Sensory Overload

While you might think that sensory overload is only something neuro-diverse people suffer from, the fact is we are all susceptible to being overloaded with sensory input. For example, as we get older we may find that spending time in the noise and bustle of a busy market or bar, that we once failed to notice or even relished, no longer appeals or indeed leaves us in need of a lie-down in a darkened room! It also helps to positively notice and appreciate moments of quiet, or soothing images like a sunset.

Creative Exhaustion

In order to be creative we need space to think: minds all abuzz with to-do lists and deadlines can crowd out creative thinking. The way to get the creative juices flowing again is to build breaks into your days. Even a twenty-minute walk can help the crammed mind to find space. In general, focussing on something entirely different can give your brain enough of a holiday that it organises itself behind the scenes and creates ‘brain space’. I have been amazed how when I make myself set off on a walk along the river, convinced I don’t really have time for it, it changes things. I set off a cracking pace, only to find that as my mind starts freewheeling and ways forward on challenges present themselves, my pace slows. On my return to my desk I often feel as if I have more time, not less. It can be hard though when ‘in the grip’ of busyness, to make yourself take that break.

Spiritual Fatigue

We know we are in need of spiritual rest when life in general feels meaningless and pointless. We are restored spiritually when we feel really ‘seen’ by others, when we feel once again that we belong, that we are accepted, and most importantly, that life has meaning. For different people this will be provided by different activities: yoga or mindfulness, religion, or voluntary activities.

Physical Tiredness

This of course is the most familiar definition of tiredness. Physical tiredness doesn’t necessarily mean muscle fatigue from hard physical labour; long hours cramped over the computer can have adverse effects, causing tension and strain. What we need is incorporate small, but frequent, movement into our days. Little and often is the key here. This can be getting up and moving around, or just standing up and stretching, or even doing small movements sitting down. Working from home, I find it helpful to fit small household chores like emptying the dishwasher or hanging out the laundry into these mini-breaks: they give my brain a break as well as getting me to move about a bit.

Indebted to Emma Beddington’s article in the Guardian, who in turn interviewed Dr Saundra Dalton-Smith. A link to Dr Dalton-Smith’s free rest quiz is attached here. https://www.restquiz.com/quiz/rest-quiz-test

Other Resources

Sarah Lewis is the owner and principal psychologist of Appreciating Change. She is author of ‘Co-Creating Planning Teams For Dialogic OD’, ‘Positive Psychology in Business’ ‘Positive Psychology at Work’ and ‘Positive Psychology and Change’ both published by Wiley. She is also the lead author of 'Appreciative Inquiry for Change Management'.

APPRECIATING CHANGE CAN HELP

Appreciating Change is skilled and experienced at supporting leaders in working in this challenging, exciting and productive way with their organisations. Find out more by looking at how we help with Leadership, Culture change and with employee Engagement.

For further information on these alternative approaches to change, please contact us or phone 07973 782 715. A selection of strength card packs are available from our online store.

If you want to know more about implementing approaches and processes that positively affect people’s happiness, engagement, motivation, morale, productivity and work relationships, see Sarah’s positive psychology books.

More blog posts categorised as ‘Positive Psychology’ 

10 Top tips for keeping up morale

Many of us are having to manage more anxiety than normal, as well as drastic changes in our daily lives. There are two key principles which it is useful to bear in mind: Managing anxiety takes mental strength and energy, and, that the state of our morale affects the state of our immune system. (At this point I have to say this doesn’t mean that anyone who becomes ill wasn’t positive enough. Absolutely not. Rather just that we know that keeping our spirits up is important to supporting our immune system. It’s not a guarantee of perfect health!)

Bearing these two key things in mind, here are ten tips for managing anxiety and keeping your spirits up

1.      Count your blessings

The new science of positive psychology has proved the benefits of the old adage of, when you are feeling low, counting your blessings. The exercise they have designed is known as the ‘three good things’ exercise. At the end of each day, identify three good things that have happened during the day. It’s good practice to write them down. Doing this regularly helps train your brain to look for the positives amongst the gloom, to find the silver linings if you like. For instance today in the paper there was a report on the positive effect of the lockdown for wildlife.

2.      Reasons to be cheerful

In addition, you might like to think each day of a good outcome of the current crisis- a reason to be cheerful. I’ve been doing this and putting them out on twitter. Today mine is going to be: Lockdown means chance of being hit by a bus – zero!

3.      Gallows humour

Which brings me to my next tip, the use of humour, specifically ‘gallows’ humour. I worked as a social worker in child protection for many years. Gallows humour was crucial for getting us through the sadder and tougher times. It exists for a reason. To make the unbearable bearable, to restore functionality quickly when a collapse into despair isn’t helpful. Be aware it doesn’t travel; it is very specific to the moment. And some people appreciate it more than others. Laughing in the face of death is a well-known coping mechanism, it works for me in small doses. Laughter reduces threats to size.

4.      Humour generally

There is lots of evidence that laughing is good for us and for our immune system. Whatever rocks your funny bone. Remember, this all may be no laughing matter, but, also, we don’t have to be solemn to be serious. Laughing is a good coping mechanism

5.      Managing your news feed

We are being offered 24-hour, worldwide updates. Following all this is not likely to do you any good. You can’t influence things other than by taking the sensible precautions we’ve all been told about. So take positive control and  limit your daily diet. Personally I read the paper rather than watch the news. One benefit of this is that there is less ‘emotional contagion’ from the page than from a person, so less transmission of anxiety. I listen to classic FM rather than my usual preference of Radio Four. I leave the room when dear beloved is getting his evening fix of doom and gloom from the evening TV news.

6.      Have a worry half-hour

This is a time-honoured technique of ‘allowing’ yourself a specific allotted time to worry as much as you like. So if you need to, spend 15 to 30 minutes allowing yourself to name all your worries. Write them in a ‘dear diary’ if you have no one at home. Or arrange a mutual strictly focused and time limited phone call with another ‘worrywart’. And when your time is up, stop, close that box and move on with your day knowing you have another half hour of worry time allocated tomorrow. With any luck doing this will reduce the likelihood of doing your worrying in the small wee hours, which is the worst possible time to do it.

7.      Get into flow

Find things to do that ‘take you out of yourself’. When we are completely absorbed in things we are in a state of ‘flow’ and when we are in this state we are not focused on our feelings. It’s like getting a holiday from your worried self. For me writing, gardening, and complicated cooking (or these days ‘creating from what we have got to hand’) all offer me productive escape time. This is usually more effective than mindless TV watching (where half your brain is still ticking along thinking about it all). A good, complex film though, is a different matter.

8.      Eat well and exercise

You are no longer at the mercy of the snack bars, train trolleys, airline catering etc. as you skedaddle from one place to another. Make the most of it to eat healthily. Lots of fruit and vegetables are good for immune system. Exercise is very important to both mental and physical health. You know the rules about keeping your distance. Put your face mask on and get out there and yomp for an hour somewhere green.

9.      Phone a friend

Social contact is another thing that is very important to our wellbeing. I am fortunate that I am marooned with dear beloved. Even so, I am resolved to talk on the phone to at least one person who isn’t him every day. You might want to talk about the situation, that’s fine. However, I would suggest you also ask them about their plans for the day, what they are hoping to achieve during this period of lockdown. In other words, try to help them see a silver lining. Ideally you will both come away from the phone call feeling slightly better not even worse!

10.  Have longer-term projects on the go

‘Wise people’, someone once said ‘prepare for the worse while hoping for the best’. Once you’ve done what you can to prepare for the worse, then turn your energy to hoping for the best. Starting projects suggests an optimism about the future that becomes self-reinforcing. Uncertainty can act to paralyse us. By pro-actively starting a project we can break out of that paralysis. The hardest part is getting started, but one you do it will draw you forward. Apart from total house rearrangement, I’ve started a new tapestry kit. These take me years to complete. But every evening I can admire the couple of square inches I’ve completed and feel I’m making progress.

And finally, I try to remind myself that, while Coronavirus is a new and scary threat, we live with our mortality all the time and habitually take precautions to increase our chances of staving it off. I cross at the lights, I avoid eating bad food, I get my flu jab,  etc. None of these guarantee my continued survival but they are habits that help. Our new temporary habits of social distancing, hand washing are really just more of the same.

Oh and chocolate! A little bit of chocolate with morning coffee just gives my morale a quick boost!

Stay well,

Sarah

Did you know? Build in Wellbeing from the beginning

Lots of people feel instinctively that happiness and wellbeing at work must be important. But are they a business necessity or a ‘nice to have’. Surely it makes more sense to ensure your business is profitable and thriving before you start worrying about how people feel?

Increasingly research suggests that investing in employee wellbeing by ensuring positive work relationships, an emphasis on strengths-based development, and worker happiness has productivity pay-offs. So why delay, start promoting positive psychology practices at work today!

Our happiness and wellbeing is at least partly within our control - and it matters!

Here is a selection of evidence-based support for the promotion of positive psychology e.g. happiness and wellbeing at work. It is clear from the evidence that a large component of the happiness we feel is within our control, and that many, more than 50% of the population, are functioning at a less than optimal state. And that our emotional state affects our performance and productivity at work:

1)    40% of the variation we experience in our sense of happiness, compared to others, is within our control. 10% is due to circumstances beyond our control and 50% due to our genetic make-up and inheritance which dictates our set point of happiness. Our 40% is influenced by ‘intentional activity’. In other words we can affect the happiness of ourselves and others. The research behind this assertion is based on twin studies (the genetic component) and the long-lasting effect of changing circumstances on happiness levels (the circumstances) leaving 40% of the variation due to individual actions.

2)    54% of Americans are ‘moderately mentally healthy’ meaning they aren’t mentally ill but they lack great enthusiasm for life and are not actively and productively engaged with the world. 11% languish – just above clinical depression.

3)    Exercise can be as effective at treating clinical depression as medication, and have an effect for longer.

4)    People whose managers focus on their strengths as 2.5x more likely to be engaged at work than those whose managers focus on their weaknesses.

5)    Highly engaged employees take, on average, 3 sick days per annum, actively disengaged employees , 6+ per year.

6)    The least happy employees average 6 days absence a year, the most happy 1.5, in the UK and USA. Liking your colleagues produces the same absence correlation.

7)    Engaged employees give 57% more discretionary effort at work.

8)    Doctors in a positive mood before making a diagnosis make the correct diagnosis 19% faster than those who were in a neutral state.

9)    In a major fast food company an intervention to reduce management turnover (the retention of managers being a major problem for this sector) the approach using AI led to a retention rate 30% higher than when problem-solving techniques were used.

10) The happiest people at work are 180% more energised than the unhappiest, they contribute 25% more and achieve their goals 30% more. They are 47% more productive meaning they are contributing a day and a quarter more than their least happy colleagues per week.

11) The most happy are 50% more motivated than the least happy. 

12) People who are happier are 25% more effective and efficient than those who are least happy.

13) Feelings and behaviour are contagious: negative behaviour has a ripple effect to two degrees, but positive behaviour can reach to three degrees.

14) The more you want recognition, the less you want money in its place.

15) We lose 40% of our productivity flip-flopping between tasks – three lost hours in a typical 8-hour day.

Sources

These findings are collated from various sources, including particularly the work of Pryce-Jones and Lyubomirsky.

Other Resources

Sarah Lewis is the owner and principal psychologist of Appreciating Change. She is author of ‘Positive Psychology at Work’ and ‘Positive Psychology and Change’ both published by Wiley. She is also the lead author of 'Appreciative Inquiry for Change Management'.

See more Engagement, Leadership Skills, Performance Management and Positive Psychology articles articles in the Knowledge Warehouse.

APPRECIATING CHANGE CAN HELP

Appreciating Change is skilled and experienced at supporting leaders in working in this challenging, exciting and productive way with their organisations. Find out more by looking at how we help with Leadership, Culture change and with employee Engagement.

For further information on these alternative approaches to change, please contact us or phone 07973 782 715. A selection of strength card packs are available from our online store.

If you want to know more about implementing approaches and processes that positively affect people’s happiness, engagement, motivation, morale, productivity and work relationships, see Sarah’s positive psychology books